Monday, August 31, 2009

A Caution to Spiritual Formation Gurus and Evangelistic Zealots

It is my observation that evangelistic activity, defined as the on purpose seeking to help bring as many people as possible to faith in Christ, is currently regarded very lightly. At the same time, there seems to be a strong emphasis on spiritual formation.

The danger is that these priorities become an either/or proposition. I came up with a pretty good quote, especially for parish pastors who want to see both evangelistic activity and spiritual formation within their Christian community. I would submit that every pastor is mandated to build both evangelistic activity and spiritual formation within his or her congregation.

In other words there is no true spiritual growth without a desire to actively help people move from non-faith to saving/reconciling faith. In the same way evangelism cannot be separated from a growing, deepening personal relationship with the resurrected Christ. Christians who are spiritually weak and shallow are a detriment to the Kingdom.



Any focus on spiritual formation must include evangelism as primary.

Any focus on evangelism must include spiritual formation as indispensable.


Hate to brag but I’m quoting myself. My next blog: “How I Came to Know Total Humility”

My observations true ... false ... inane ? Any ya-but responses. Thinking that quote ya-buts itself.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Institutional Church

Left this comment on a friend's blog site, http://jamescopple-the-seeker.com/, thought I would put it here as well.

I have been a parish pastor for 28 years and have been early retired, ie on disability, with Parkinson’s disease, for the past 5 years. I am beginning to realize how much I have lived within my own small spiritual ecosystem and not needed to interact with the institution from a different perspective. I am finding that it is alarmingly rare for Christians to have a relationship with the institutional church while sharing a corporate vision and having some sense of involvement in the nature and direction of that congregational vision.

Too long a sentence, but I think I see a great deal of defensiveness and even aggression against the congregational peons by leadership. To me, a servant leader procures most of his/her authority from a shared , God given vision on the congregational level. I’m not sure if I am seeing this because I’m getting old and crotchety or just seeing things more accurately now that I am in a different position.

I am SURE my friend Jim is right, however, the Church is hard to be around but the world would be lost without it.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Leper Lessons - Kenya Update 8/28/08

This morning I read the story at the beginning of Matthew chapter 8 about the leper who approached Jesus asking to be cleansed: "Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean!" The Barclay commentary described what a terrible, debilitating and tragic disease leprosy was. Not only that, but how poorly lepers were treated within the religious culture of Israel. The ideas of cultural sensitivity and awareness have been on my mind the last week, so this story is especially interesting. Jesus went on and healed the leper, touching him. In that touch Jesus became unclean and committed a culturally unacceptable act. Yet it was love that motivated Him, love for this outcast, love for those who are hurting, for this one man who needed the touch of God.

I hope that is why I am in Kenya. Is it too presumptuous to aim to be God's hand in a distant land? Not to say that the people here can be represented by a destitute leper - that would not be fair. Yet that question of culture is more complicated than I thought it would be. I am well versed at doing the "need meeting thing" at home within a society and culture I am familiar with. It turns out the process of meeting needs in Kenya is far from the process in Massachusetts or New York. I believe that the lifestyle of love to which God calls us, which we see demonstrated through Jesus, is truly cross cultural.

Jesus defied the culture that ostracized the hurting, but not fully. Immediately after Jesus healed the leper he instructed him to fulfill the requirement in the temple for his cleansing. Jesus was not an ignorant foreigner - he was no mzungu. He understood the value and importance of the Jewish culture. Perhaps that is why I am struggling. I must intentionally pursue a working knowledge of how things work around here, so that as a Jesus person I can provide healing and love in the ways I know best (even if that is reformatting hard drives).

My ultimate goal is to be Jesus to the good people here in and around ANU. If that means feeling baby sat and under foot, so be it. I just hope that those who are doing the sitting, whose feet I am tripping up, will have patience with me.

More Than a Clunker

More Than a Clunker

God really does take care of those who follow Him. We are king’s kids and “He don’t want us driving no junk”. In spite of the fact that I am a retired pastor on disability, putting kids through college, on a fixed income, my wife and I just love our shiny black Lincoln Continental. We enjoy the V8 power, recline in the plush leather seats, relax in air conditioned comfort as we drive on the air soft suspension.

The fact that our Lincoln is 14 years old does not take away from any of the comfort we enjoy. We are genuinely thankful for our shiny old black Lincoln Continental. It strikes me how much more we can appreciate and enjoy material things as followers of Christ. There is no doubt in my mind that we enjoy that 14 year old car many times more than the wealthiest executive on the fanciest private jet on the way to Washington. So already the Lincoln in the driveway is more than a "clunker."

It was sad news when my wife called after a suicidal deer on a dark road chose to take his final leap in front of our big black Lincoln. The bumper was damaged, grill cracked, the full light assembly was damaged, the fiber glass hood and fender were both cracked. There were no injuries aside from the poor troubled deer but immediately “Cash for Clunkers” ran through my mind. Our particular car did not qualify, however, so we began to consider repair.

I began checking online for salvage parts, looked up the number of a friend who helped with a previous accident, trying to figure out what we could or should do. The parts even from a salvage yard would be well over $1,000 plus shipping. The new parts would need to be painted etc. etc. It was looking like clunker heaven for our black, shiny favorite car. It was obviously in God’s hands and we live with the confidence that He does provide for His children. I had been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease 9 years ago. We were looking at 15 to 20 years of income that would not come in. God has His ways. Somehow we live in a beautiful, small house of our own and have put four children through college and we eat 3 or 4 meals almost every day. So we knew that God does indeed work. We prayed for His direction.

A couple of days later there was a knock on my door (guess he couldn’t figure out how to put the two wires together to ring the door bell ... got to fix that door bell). Looking out the front window I could see two 1995 black shiny Lincolns in my driveway. A man we did not know was at the door telling me that he was getting rid of his 1995 black Lincoln Continental and wanted to know if I wanted to buy his tires. I looked his car over and told him that I didn’t really need tires but I could use the rest of his car. Well his car was going to be "clunked" on Saturday and it was then Thursday night.

I called my good friend John who is a mechanic/carpenter/ handy man do most anything kind of guy. John has been battling cancer for the past year and a half . The initial news was that he had 6 to 8 weeks to live. The prognosis is still terminal but by the grace of God John is a shining witness to the reality of genuine faith. He had received a debilitating chemo-therapy treatment a few days before but said he would be glad to help. Tony is the Dad of a handicapped child that my wife cares for as a nurse, who has a full shop with a lift and everything needed to do the work. Tony " just happened" to have the day off and was willing to help.

The next day John and I drove two Lincolns over to Tony's shop to swap the damaged parts with the providentially provided parts salvaged from an about to be cashed in "clunker." The next 6 hours we extracted and replaced hundreds of screws, clips, belts, and our well beloved luxury car looked new again. There was much more that happened during those 6 hours. How inspiring it was that John very easily as one friend to another shared with Tony how the love and strength from God had made the last year and a half the best months of his life. There was a bonding that happened as three men were blessed to be part of God’s working as only He can work.

I don’t fully understand the workings of God’s providence. Does God hunt deer with Lincoln Continentals? Does He always deliver car parts? Is every stubbed toe an act of God? When I think too much about it my brain starts to hurt. I guess I don’t really understand God’s providence much at all.

There are, however, some things I do know ... or maybe more accurately ...there are some things I “faith”. I know that God was at work in all these things for good. My wife and I look ahead to an uncertain future dealing with Parkinson’s disease. What a beautiful re-assurance that God’s “eye” is upon us. We are stronger in the faith knowing God will continue to work for our good.

A good Catholic man knows, by faith, that God had sent him to knock on a strangers door to deliver His car parts. He was excited as well that his shiny black Lincoln could be an organ donor before the fatal clunking. My friend John, so close to heaven, had another opportunity to splash joy and peace all over the driveway as we worked. The God of Creation has received honor and glory as we retell the story of a special delivery from God’s Salvage Yard Inc.

And we are cruisin’ in our Lincoln still.

Bedtime Routine

I think I'll go ahead and be the first to post on this thing besides Jon. I'm wary because I don't think my writing will be nearly as witting or enjoyable to read as other's in the family but you will all just have to deal! Coming home to family after being away for so long is one of the best things ever. I can not say enough how blessed I am by each and every member of my family. Staying with Dave and Heather brings such joy to my life, which makes the slight lack of sleep totally worth it. It was the bedtime routine that inspired this post. Each night little Meg gets ready for bed, lights dimmed in the house and they sit at the piano and worship together. Coming from a non-Christian environment for the summer and into this house hold that is just bursting at the seems with love for God and each other was amazing. Going on from that, I can't thank the men in my family enough for the incredible example of a Godly life they give me. I might just have the highest expectations possible for who ever my future husband will be because they will have to live up to what I've seen in my brother's and Dad's lives. And I'm not leaving out Mom and Heather here either, you both show me how to be the loving wife and mother I want to be one day. I love you all so much! Thanks for being a part of my life every day.

Haircuts and Handshakes - Kenya Update 8/27/09

For the past two days I have been working with various CS students who have come early to work/volunteer at ANU to run maintenance on the computer labs - we take them apart, vacuum them, wipe them down and reformat all the hard drives. It is fun enough and I met a few folks that are good to be around - they gave me an African name so I would feel more welcome - it helps. Mwangi is a Kikuyu word which means "light"...I wonder why thats my name (not really). I've been doing my best to learn some Swahili from the old "Teach Yourself Swahili" book I found in my flat. I was reminded of Sr. Das and those terrible years in Spanish IV and V as I make little flash cards to learn new words every night. I'm not sure who enjoys it more when I get a word right, me or my Kenyan friends.

I'm learning some very interesting things about Kenyan culture. It is proper, when entering a room, to shake every one's hand. Grasping your right forearm with your left hand while you shake is a signal of respect, you use this when you shake the hand of someone who has a higher rank than yourself (student, teacher...driver, administrator etc.) ... this emphasis on class is very surreal especially as I observe it from my perspective. You see I am also learning what it means to be a minority. I am still processing some of the cultural and social racial constructs I have observed, whether it be between tribes or between Africans and Mzungus (white/Europeans), it is complex and systemic - its a lot to process.

Anyway I had some of my new friends take me into Rongai (a townish place 10 minutes from ANU) to get a haircut! It was one of the most interesting experiences of my life, I am so glad that Mikey and Xavier came with me. I ended up paying 200 shillings (sh200 = $2.56), which is a great deal if you're in the States, but its more than twice the barber would have charged a Kenyan. What is crazy is that the original price the barber said was 500 shillings! Anyway the haircut itself was so different than any I've had in the past. They were meticulous with my side burns and the fade on the edges, gave me nice smelling aftershave things, then a stinking head message! The gal you did the message told me if I brought her back to NY with me she would be my personal barber - definitely shady - I avoided eye contact with her after that. My friends said they never got treatment like that, and Mikey said he thought the gal had the hots for me. I told him she probably has the hots for every Mzungu that comes into the shop, and he laughingly agreed.

I am starting to forget what I have written about in these entries, so if I repeat anything I apologize. The internet is very poor on wireless, but better here in the computer lab. I will have to find someway to monopolize on the consistancy of the lab while being able to access all my personal stuff on the laptop.

They teach a course on Java here, I might buy the textbook and software and work through it. There has been a crazy pentecostal group here all week - my window is right by the chapel. It is very strange hearing them go nuts all night (till midnight) casting out demons and screaming their heads off, but its awesome waking up to the sound of 200 voices singing Swahili worship songs at 6 am.

God has been faithful in providing for me encouragement - whether it be through the goodness of the missionaries here, the faithfulness of family, the patience and goodness of my girlfriend, or the mischievousness and kindness of the Kenyans I have met. I know the prayers of God's people are making a difference, and that they are what is actualizing Isaiah 58:11 for my life in Kenya.

"The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail."

Isaiah 58:11

Monday, August 24, 2009

Kenya Update 8/24/09

I spent some time thinking about how crazy our bodies are, how biological clocks work and how international travel, without fail, turns you upside down and inside out. Granted these contemplations occupied my attention last night from about 1:15 am to 3:30 am, while I stared at my ceiling, listening to the guard dogs fight and wondering how I was going to function the coming day with so little rest! Luckily, at 3:30am I decided to "go to bed again" - so I covered my window with one of my blankets, had some toast, changed into my usual sleeping attire and read the Return of the King for about 35 minutes. Then I was able to go to sleep.

I learned something else about Kenya this morning. Evidently the government, in a way, rations electricity. This means that two, three maybe 4 times a day, electricity is cut off at ANU. I learned that this morning when I woke up at 9:30am (opposed to the plan: 7:00am for breakfast) Woops! I did not feel very guilty though considering how much I needed sleep. Tonight I will get to bed nice and early and hopefully get this jet lag monkey off my back!

This morning we drove Dr. James' stuff to the air freight shipping yard. Again, its ridiculous how different things are in this country. The roads are chaos, but folks are so patient with each others decisiveness road rage is literally non-existent!

I met with some folks today, Shadrack Kirunga will be "my man" when the James(s) leave, he is the Assistant Dean of Students. He asked me to come in tomorrow morning at 8, after he had some conversations at a meeting tonight about the work that needs to be done/opportunities for me to serve coming up. From what I gather, there are several things I can get involved in. They have a mentoring program for high school students that starts at the end of this week, also the music director on campus is in "desperate need" of someone who can read music on piano. Score! Or rather, sheet music! The folks in the science department are also looking for someone to tutor math (always, everywhere, people want math tutors!) The folks at IT were not quite as clear with what they need. They obviously need help, as it took them an hour and a half to set my laptop up for wireless. Hopefully I can help them out somehow with my limited IT troubleshooting skills. Speaking of which, here is an excellent xkcd comic on that very topic:

All in all it has been a decent day. I am very happy to have (all be it inconsistent) wireless working on my laptop. I got to see Christina Dave Heather and Meg tonight - and hopefully any minute now I'll connect with my Allison!! I am still not quite adjusted to things, I still feel totally uncomfortable everywhere I go, but my jobs around campus are starting to piece together. Mary Jane gave me some tea, which is very very exciting, and helps me feel at home. Dinner was interesting tonight, consisting of rice and two variations of meat goop. I hope my insides don't explode.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Kenya Update 8/23/09

Sunday Sunday Sunday!

I woke up this morning to birds chirping, not quite the same as the birds in the States, just different enough to remind myself – oh yeah, I’m in KENYA! This is my first day at Africa Nazarene University. I had a great flight down yesterday (yester 2 days?) and arrived Saturday night. After a harrowing drive from the airport to the campus here at ANU, I settled into my flat, emailed my family and konked out! I finally met Mary Jane and Randy James (the folks I have been emailing for the past 6 months), they are lovely people who, unfortunately, will be returning to the US on Thursday. So, I will be doing my best to get to know some folk around ANU in the coming days.

The plan for today is to do church at 10 (which is exciting, Randy is preaching) then we are going into the Mount Carmel Missionary Center in Nairobi to gather with returning and departing missionaries. This will be a chance for me to meet some more of the good people who serve in this mission field. There is still no definitive word on what I’ll be doing. Mary Jane said that that might be the most difficult thing for me while I’m here, taking it a day at a time and not always knowing what “the plan” is. “That’s Africa!” she says. I can see that it will be an adjustment!

The campus here is very interesting. I got to bed about 11:50 last night, which means I was fortunate enough to hear the dogs be released at 12. It is a security measure taken on campus that from midnight to 5am there are 40-45 guard dogs that roam the campus. They must have a good time, at least it sounds like it. This one poor dog got beat up by the other dogs or something…I was awakened by his yelps and cries, which differed from the rhythm of barks and snarls I fell asleep to. Needless to say, the staff at ANU doesn’t need to worry about curfew for their undergrads!

I met a couple nice ladies named Fiona and Mary at breakfast; they are teachers who study at ANU during their school’s break. They take a 4 week intensive module based course. They taught me some Swahili, which is fun for me and I think for them watching this poor American kid try to learn their language. “Hujambo” is a typical greeting a la “How are you (singular)?” to which one would respond “sijambo” or “I’m fine”. It’s pretty neat; there is also an old ghetto “Teach Yourself Swahili” book in my flat so I can work on it on my own. Good thing I forgot to spend the money on a book for myself!

Speaking of my flat, it’s a small one bedroom affair with a kitchen/living room and bathroom. There is solid used furniture and a really old stove/oven. I can get used to living here, but I will be looking for ways to make it my home. Right now it feels like I’m living at camp or something. I may find something to hang on the walls or even move the furniture around, we’ll see what I come up with.

Please continue to pray for me as I try to be courageous. Customs was very scary for me, and even getting up for breakfast gave me a similar feeling of “I am totally uncomfortable…” I hope you will pray that I have the courage to be myself in the face of these new and scary experiences because ultimately, when I push through that initial fear of the unknown, I am confident the rewards will be great.

Lastly, there is no sign of acid spitting ants yet. Hurray!

Monday, August 17, 2009

Fishkill Party!

I'm home in Fishkill for my last week in the US. So far we've had some quality family time on Saturday (Dave, Heather, the Burrito, and Ryan were hanging out) and some quality friend time (my "send off party" on Sunday). All in all it's time to strike a perfect balance between relaxing and preparing (seems to be the theme of the summer, I think). I am very grateful for the generosity of my friends and family. I feel more and more confident about my trip thanks to their support and care.

It is incredibly hot, but that's fine with me. The plan for today is to deposit my pay checks, write some thank you notes, take an inventory of my crap (gross!), then go to Peg Paul's house to look at pictures of Kenya that her son took 10 years ago.

Also, I have a hankering to go for a hike to find that swimming hole I enjoyed um...11 years ago in Beacon (called "the naturals"??)...talk about a perfect day to go swimming in the woods! I just hope I can convince Allie to join me - she's here for the week which is awesome.

So, stay cool, world. My thoughts go to the Kwaminator and those in his running camp who are will spend the week running in the sun and heat. Let the sweat flow freely while you cling to your consciousness. You're a better man than I.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

<3 Days Off

Today was a great day, a rainy day, and I did not have to work at Hannaford. I was also lucky enough to have Allie visiting. The original plan was to hit the beach and make a sand castle, but we decided against digging in this chilly stay-at-home day. Even though we totally would have shown up this guy:



In lieu of getting gross on the beach, me and Allie took advantage of my free August rental and watched K-PAX. K-PAX is an awesome movie, and everyone should watch it. I like it even more now than when I watched it 4 years ago. It is definitely nerdy enough for EE type people, yet human enough for the rest of the population. Thats all I have to say tonight - watch K-PAX.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Senior discount day.


One neat thing about Hannaford is that every Tuesday senior citizens are eligible for a 5% discount on whatever they buy. I think it is tragic how our older friends and loved ones are often ostracized, so the more we can do for those of the wrinkled persuasion, the better! On another hand, senior discount day also provides me with hours and hours of very very interesting interactions with some very colorful characters.

This one woman I have named (affectionately) "Smiles" is the sourest puss you can ever meet. Immediately this morning she glared right at me. She was only purchasing one bottle of wine, so I grabbed the little brown paper wine bags to wrap it up for her. She swiftly scolded me saying "I want a big bag!" Thinking I understood, I assured her I would put her wrapped wine in a plastic bag after the paper to which she angrily responded "No! The big paper bag in a plastic bag! I know what I want!" With my taught, "unfairly yelled at but sucking it up" smile on, I handed her her wine to be chastised again to leave it on the counter behind me - she will pick it up later.

About an hour later Smiles came through my line again, scowl in place. I thought "Oh this time I'll totally get the best of her nastiness." While I was finishing ringing out the customer in front of her, I looked at her, smiled and asked "Would you like this order in paper and plastic too?" Appalled, (and I do mean appalled) she glared at me and said "I will tell you, when I get to you..." At this point I gave up and did my business as quickly and pleasantly as possible in the face of such monumental crankiness. I suppose I am a sadistic or more than slightly maniacal person, but It did do me great pleasure when she requested my bag boy to escort her to her car to help with the bags. The look of hopelessness he gave me had me grinning for minutes!

There are plenty of nice old folk, and plenty of mean ones. There are plenty of smart folks, plenty of folks who are oblivious. In general, in a grocery store you get the full spectrum of your everyday citizen. From the British father of 3 young boys, to the Yukoslavian couple who rails against Stop and Shop for intentionally over charging them, to the plethora of single mothers, working mothers, grandmothers and fairy god mothers (that is a totally different story!) ...needless to say, it keeps things interesting and I don't mind at all!

Monday, August 10, 2009

The least interesting man in the world!

I have such a peculiar set of complexes. One of which is procrastinating. This is nothing I'm proud of, if anything I'd say I was embarrassed, but I am at the very least systematic in my procrastination. Throughout the last month I have been doing mental gymnastics; I suppose it would be described as a fencing match, excuses and justifications artfully countering obligations and responsibilities. My brother Dave asked whether or not this blog was a "failed experiment"...after assuring him that it was not dead yet, I clicked over to xkcd and read this web comic: So, after deciding to be a better "blogger" on the 21st of July (one month before my time in Kenya), and the 1st of August (a new month, wahoo!) I made a new commitment this week, to start tomorrow (10 days before before I leave), and if that failed, Friday (t-minus 7 days). Yet as I was sitting here in the computer lab at ENC I did some uncharacteristic, I decided to just DO it. No system, no reason, but also no procrastination! Life in Quincy has gotten significantly more interesting. As of last weekend I have moved back into the dorms for about 9 days. I will be a fill in RA for the summer capstone program at ENC. I have been juggling tutoring, working at Hannaford and kicking people out of lounges at midnight. These kids are nice enough, but DANG get some sleep! It's very strange to see my "college" biological clock slowly fade into something normal. It's kind of like watching a much loved pet slowly decide it likes your younger neighbor better. I guess its only a matter of time before Chester the biological clock-cat moves in and leaves me with Harold the cranky puss adult-clock. Speaking of sleeping, this Calvin and Hobbes comic speaks very well to part of my philosophy on life:


This is the last week I'll be living here in Quincy, on Friday I will be going home to New York for a week to hang out with my family and Allie before I leave. I am super excited to go home. It is going to be so tough living apart from Allie, Mom and Dad and my siblings for so many months. Yet I have confidence that God will supply what I need while overseas, whether it be a close friend or an old African lady to mother me, things will be fine. So this week the goal is to make lists, go shopping and get all my ducks in a row! I am very close and only need a few productive hours to wrap everything up. Don't forget to remember the wisdom of Hobbes: