Ran across an old article I put on my blog ... for better or for worse

What to Do When Your Pastor is a Ninny


As one pastor put it, “this is a tough gig”. I would submit that having a pastor is about as tough a gig as being a pastor. Once in awhile you run into a pastor who also happens to be a ninny. A ninny is a technical term defined as “a sincere tortured soul who loves God and is oblivious to a significant amount of what is happening in the church community where he/she serves.”

By that definition it is not whether your pastor is a ninny but rather how big a ninny is she. (I will alternate genders in case some ninny reads this and can’t sleep at night because he got more space than she) Most pastors have achieved some level of ninny-hood because: 1. People are afraid to talk to him 2. She doesn’t want people to talk to him. (Sticking to the alternate gender rule if it kills me and ruins the article (even more)) 3. People would rather gossip 4. People have tried to talk to her but he wouldn’t listen.
There are some important things to remember:

God calls ninnies to do his work.

Jacob was a slippery heel grasper and couldn’t be trusted. Moses couldn’t preach his way out of a wet paper bag. Solomon lost his mind. David stayed home chasing women instead of going to war. Peter was a big mouth. Thomas was as negative as they get. Judas was greedy to the point of betrayal.

It is amazing how God uses people who are less than perfect, make mistakes, and have limited ability. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to accept your mistake making less than perfect pastor, who is not a world renowned orator and do your best to make her look good. Talk about the things he does to help others. Listen to her sermon and comment on it in such a way that people know you listened. Build him up and you will be doing God’s work.

One Person's Ninny is another persons messiah ...

Before you are critical of your pastor remember that what you do can hurt and disillusion others as well as your pastor. People have come to faith because your pastor preached effectively or knelt with them at home or held their hand at the hospital. Somewhere between 20 - 100% of the people in your church love your pastor. If you bring him down in their eyes you damage their faith and guarantee disunity in the church. Be careful. Consider others before you try to save the Kingdom of God single-handedly.

Burning at the stake rarely improves performance

Beating your pastor up does not improve her ability to serve as your pastor. Pastors care very deeply about pleasing God and sometimes even more so about pleasing people. If there is information your pastor needs to know that will cause him to expect she might be a ninny, make sure it is in the context of 10 parts encouragement to 1 part criticism. A toasted pastor will often get testy in the pulpit ... Something you do not want.

You are most likely a ninny too

Looking back at the definition, it is likely you are a sincere caring soul who is also oblivious to much of what is happening in the church. Your pastor knows circumstances and information that you cannot know that explain why she does what he does. Give her the benefit of the doubt. If you are patient with him you will set an example that will be contagious in your church fellowship. You will then be the grateful recipient of this patience when someone notices you are a ninny.


First hand information turns into 2nd and 3rd hand about 6" from your lips

Be careful who you talk to. Every word you say and some you don’t say, will be broadcast over coffee, over the phone, over the internet over and over. The "sermon was boring message" turns into the pastor’s spouse got a nose ring in about 45 minutes. Talk to your pastor first. Sure she is scary but he needs to learn to listen just like you need to learn to talk directly to her. No one survives a gossip feeding frenzy so be careful little lips what you say and to whom they say it.


Maybe God is calling you to help ninnies

Someone needs to do it. Oblivious by definition calls for someone to help remove the oblivion. Be patient. Pastor types are not always easy to help. Often he thinks he is the messiah and needs some patient therapeutic reality checks. Often recognizing her oblivion will cause him great pain and you will need to encourage her. Being a former ninny, I know how much, they need patient, persistent, caring oblivion busters. Don’t give up on your pastor. Help him become even more effective in the work God has called her to.